Keywords
I Love Her Again · Cognitive Bandwidth · Scientific Timing · UFC 333 · Aston Villa
TOC
🎵I Love Her Again
最初在 IG teaser 里听到《I Love Her Again》的一小段时,我有点迷惑。前面《Life Sentence》和《Only You》都love song,这首听起来也像一首 love song:年少时喜欢上一个人,高中毕业后去纽约上大学,一路追寻。刚开始我甚至往某个同学、某段经历上理解,但越听越不对。尤其到了后面那些难听的话,如果是说人的话 now your puccy's watered down这句有点太难听了 LOL
听着听着,才逐渐意识到,他写的可能是自己所爱的东西。把 hip-hop 当成爱人,去讲相遇、追逐、亲密、失望,以及重新接受。这种 analogy 当然不新鲜,但每个人进入音乐的时间不同,遇见的声音不同,和它共同经历的变化也不同。同一种叙事方式,装进去的依然可以是一段不同的旅程。
那个视角后来又转了回来。起初觉得是她变了,变得陌生、商业化,越来越难理解;后来才发现,自己也不再像以前那样花时间听她,却仍然希望她停在自己最熟悉的样子。年龄在增长,生活在变化,新一代还在进入这个世界。重新爱上她,也就包含了接受她继续变化这件事。
所爱的事物都可以这样,一些goal和追求。
这种情绪的变化像一条带着过冲、最终慢慢收敛的曲线:最初被新鲜感吸引,热情一路冲高;接触深入,发现阴暗面,评价又跌向另一个极端,甚至忍不住厌恶 破口大骂 一种28定律的分布。那种厌恶里往往还留着最初投入的重量,曾经越喜欢,后来的变化就越容易被体验成背叛。再往后,才逐渐能把对方的变化和自己的期待放在一起看,承认其中确实有自己不喜欢的部分,也承认自己曾经希望它永远停在最熟悉的样子。最后的和解因此有了不同的质地。I Love Her Again, Again 里保留着整个失望和厌恶的过程;重新喜欢的时候,已经知道自己面对的是什么。
Lyrics
Let's get it
Yo, I never knew a luh-luh-luh, a love like this
(Like this, like this, like this, like this, like)
Gotta be somethin' for me to write this
(Write this, write this, write this, write this, write)
I never knew a luh-luh-luh, a love like this
(Like this, like this, like this, like this, like)
Gotta be somethin' for me to write this, yeah
(Write this, write this, write this, write this, write)
Back when I was just a jit hangin' on the strip (boom)
She's the girl that I would see in every niggas whip (boom)
I was much too young to truly know what constitutes
The difference 'tween a girl next door and/or a prostitute (yeah)
I heard some older brothers say they knew her from before
She lost her common sense when niggas brought her out on tour (yeah)
She's all about the money now, they labeled her a whore
I heard what they was sayin', but to me she seemed pure (yeah)
'Cause all I seen was beauty on her face when she would pass (yeah)
I wanted to date her, but there was no way for me to ask (huh)
'Cause I was just a youngin' and she's rippin' and-a runnin'
But I knew when I get older that one day we'd meet at last (huh)
I went to college in New York 'cause I heard she was there (yeah)
But when I got to town, I swear it's like she disappeared
I went to hit the Tunnel where they said that she would hang
But when I got off the train, I saw that it been closed for years (yeah)
I showed a picture to this kid, like, "Help me find her, yo" (yeah)
He looked and said, "Man, she just left a little while ago"
I saw her with some luggage on the way to JFK
When I asked what she was doin', she said, "Movin' to the A" (fuck)
Movin' to the A? (Fuck)
Fuck (fuck)
Fuck, I gotta
Aight, I'ma, I'ma, I'ma get her (fuck)
I never knew a luh-luh-luh, a love like this
(Like this, like this, like this, like this, like)
Gotta be somethin' for me to write this
(Write this, write this, write this, write this, write)
I never knew a luh-luh-luh, a love like this
(Like this, like this, like this, like this, like)
Gotta be somethin' for me to write this, yeah
(Write this, write this, write this, write this, write)
Yeah, my heart was broken, dawg, I wanted to be where she was at
But I was happy in a way, the South was on the map (yeah)
But niggas in the barbershop ain't feel the same as me
They said, "Shorty changed since she left the city, she got wack"
They wanted her back, but said it sound like she was trapped (huh)
They hated the slang she used, the way her fingers snapped (huh)
It's funny how the tables turned several years later
These would be the same dudes that started sayin' shit was cap
But I was still in love with her, I couldn't hide that fact
I found her on the internet, kept up with her like that
I sent a lot of messages, she finally wrote me back
When I dropped the mixtape, she said she liked the way I rap
And that was all I needed, booked a flight, and it was on
The first night I'm strikin' like some lightning in a storm
The more noise she made, it's like the better I perform
But it was more than sexual, we had a deeper bond
Love, she's why I put my truth into a song
For years, we told each other everythin' that's going on
She said, "I gotta tell ya, I done rocked a lot of fellas
But with you there's something special, I think you could be the one"
Now, when it comes to love, jealousy will often creep
Them type of games is why two of my homies start to beef
To both of them she said, "You're the best I ever had"
And the whole time that bitch was sayin' that type of shit to me (fuck)
I never knew a luh-luh-luh, a love like this
(Like this, like this, like this, like this, like)
Gotta be somethin' for me to write this
(Write this, write this, write this, write this, write) gotta be somethin' for me
I never knew a luh-luh-luh, a love like this
(Like this, like this, like this, like this, like)
Gotta be somethin' for me to write this, yeah
(Write this, write this, write this, write this, write) yeah, uh
I was naive to believe she was mine when I bagged her
'Cause I would come to learn that none of us could truly have her
She was for the streets, I'll never be her only mans
I couldn't believe it when I seen her with an OnlyFans
When I clicked the link inside the bio of her 'Gram
I saw a version of her that I couldn't understand
Implants, surgically enhanced details
Poppin' perks, mumblin' while twerkin' BBL
I'm thinkin' this the bitch that used to tell me be yourself
All of a sudden for the wealth she's becomin' someone else
That's when I realized as I started lookin' back
The older that she gets, the younger she be tryna act
In fact, I'm thinkin' that's gonna always be the case
As long as she's alive, it's younger niggas that she'll chase
But I was in my feelings, so I called her out of name
Like, "Bitch you dead to me, and why the fuck you go and change?"
She screamed, "You got the nerve to say that I switched
You turned me from your main thing to your side bitch
It seemed like every day you was blowing kisses to me
But years went past, now you don't even listen to me"
At first, I was defensive, "Bitch, listen how you sound
So many niggas fucked you, now your pussy's watered down"
But the more I thought about her quotes, she was right
There was a time when she was on my phone day and night
Singin' songs to me that I heard a time or two
Some were kinda old and some were kinda new
But you'll see how it is getting older, raising kids
All that spendin' time and listenin' to her is hard to do
But, yo, I need to stop judging and accept her
The problem from the start is I was just tryna to possess her
And have her for my own, didn't wanna let her roam
Mama said, "You should've known she was like that when you met her"
I never knew a luh-luh-luh, a love like this (damn)
(Like this, like this, like this, like this, like)
She was kinda like that when I met her
Gotta be somethin' for me to write this
(I guess I just couldn't see her)
(Write this, write this, write this, write this, write) I gotta love her for her
Yeah, so I'm tryna make amends
We reminisce on old times and play the latest trends
As long as she's alive, I know I'll always have a friend
Thank God, I think I'm falling back in love with her again
I never knew a luh-luh-luh, a love like this
Like this, like this, like this, like this, like, uh
Gotta be somethin' for me to write this
☕Gooddays
最近的片单:Tulsa King,S04E02,Blind Rooster;MobLand,S02E06,A Different Corner。
Human Bandwidth
↩️
最近越来越明显地感觉到,人已经成了和 AI 协作过程中的决速步骤。代码可以很快写出来,PR 很快堆起来,其他项目的细节也在不断向前推进;但这些东西最终还需要人去理解、review、验证、纠错和决定。AI 降低了一部分执行成本,同时把更多审核工作推到了人面前。生成端的吞吐量越来越大,人的载荷能力却没有同步增长,于是流程开始积压。
这时候,继续提高 AI 的输出速度,未必还能提高整体效率。再多完成几项任务,可能只是让待审核队列更长。人又不能像芯片一样,靠换一代制程就把硬件升级。除了继续规范 workflow 和 framework,真正值得想的,是有限的注意力怎样完成更多有效判断。这个很头疼,因为感觉建立workflow 和 framework也非常耗费精力,需要打磨思考,优化甚至创新。
UFC 333
| card | res |
|---|---|
| Alexander Volkanovski vs. Movsar Evloev | Volkanovski,R2 4:54,TKO |
| Petr Yan vs. Merab Dvalishvili | Yan,一致判定,48–47 × 3 |
| Lone’er Kavanagh vs. Ramazan Temirov | Kavanagh,R1 4:28,TKO |
| Alexander Volkov vs. Rizvan Kuniev | Volkov,一致判定,29–28、30–27、30–27 |
| Grant Dawson vs. Nurullo Aliev | Dawson,一致判定,29–27 × 3 |
Lone’er
Lone’er 很冷静。几次双方都被打得有点 stunned 之后,能感觉到他的防守也在调整。Ramazan 则有点看低对手,一上来就甩开了摇奖,想直接把人吃掉。看着会想起上次 Conor Benn 对 Ryan Garcia:上来追着打,很想靠气势和力量解决问题,但对面也是有 KO 能力的人。这么往前冲,多少有点不尊重人了。
Garcia 和 Lone’er 都有能力让你为这种判断付出代价。想压住对方当然可以,但不能因为自己喜欢往前走,就默认对方会一直往后退。
Volkov
感觉 Alexander Volkov 最近有意在 build 自己的 profile,多一些曝光,也让大家看到更多比赛之外的形象。职业选手到了这个阶段,怎样让人记住自己,也是比赛以外的一部分工作。
Rizvan Kuniev 的技术也不错。虽然有明显的 belly,四肢却很灵活,看着会想到「散打沙皇」穆斯里穆。体型和动作能力之间,有时候就是有这种反差。
Dawson
Dawson 这哥们,怎么感觉上来没几分钟体力槽就清空了。哈哈哈。
挺喜欢这种风格的美国人,算比较典型。没有什么特别突出的技能长处,也不总能拿出特别漂亮的表现;会自嘲,对自己的处境有清晰认识,却不影响他继续刻苦努力。知道自己有多少不足,下一场还是认真准备,站上去继续打。一种普通人的 fighting spirit。人也不错,some shit jokes though.
最近 Embedded 里那番关于世界冠军和美国冠军的话,也很对他的气质:既然想成为世界冠军,就不能只愿意在自己熟悉的地方比赛。在哪里,都是招之即战。
前两回合,你工人爷爷又带着铁肺回来了。Merab 的节奏一起来,那种压迫感还是熟悉的味道。第三回合开始均衡,慢热的 Yan 也逐渐进入比赛,后面的 boxing 看着很过瘾。
Yan的Elite boxing 放在 MMA 里,还是很有质感。动作干净,处理紧凑,攻防衔接里很少有多余的东西。那种优雅又很扎实的感觉,是另一种观看乐趣。阿布扎比现场的「Russia」拉西亚 呼喊声震耳欲聋,有时候真像到了俄罗斯的主场,一个飞地 LOL。
Content Creators
嘿,咱们这里有个 YouTuber 要上场 defend 腰带了。
Volk 真是紫薯头灭霸。平时做YT 烹饪短视频,和上场保卫腰带之间的切换,总有一种挺好笑的反差。能把 content creator 和这个级别的职业竞技放在同一个人身上看,也算这个时代独有的节目。at the end of the day, all for life
以后要是真能看到 Arman 和 Volk 争 lightweight title,那就是两个 YouTuber 大战。当然,腰带的走向、谁继续打、谁选择退役,都还得往后看。Movsar Evloev 也还有机会。等到 Volk 退休,featherweight 恐怕又会进入群雄逐鹿的乱世。
⚽ManCity
↩️
Aston Villa 2–1 Manchester City。Nicolas Jackson 双响,尤其第二个进球,看完很感叹。
爱美丽带的队,总让我觉得氛围很好。未必堆着一群最耀眼的超级球星,但几乎全民皆兵,所有人都愿意付出、愿意卖命。Villa 这几年本来就是很难啃的骨头,韧性很强,遇强则强。我的观感是,这种球队很适合在淘汰赛里突出重围,能从强队头上拿分;但面对需要自己主动拿下的对手 下半区选手,又未必总能稳定兑现。这也是联赛里的持续竞争力,和欧战某一晚的爆发力之间有意思的区别。
看 Jackson 在这样的队伍里踢球,会觉得有些阶段格外珍贵。也许以后他会去皇萨仁那样的豪门,但现在和身边这群「穷哥们」一起打天下,每一次冲刺都还带着很直接的炽热。很容易让人想到早期的雷霆三少:未来还没有完全展开,大家一起经历风霜,也一起相信还会有更多东西等着自己。
日后在豪门捧起奖杯,当然也很好。但回过头看,那些和伙伴一起往上走、还没有成为最终答案的日子,可能也有一种后来很难复刻的灿烂。
Thanks for being an insider till the end!
Till next, stay safe and stay hydrated!
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